Sunday, 30 August 2009

The penalty paid for playing Old Trafford

Keeping a half-interested eye on the old League Division One - where, as usual, four teams dispute the top prize while the odd arriviste over-spender or cannily-organised XI try to crash the party - I find that this year, as most years, my neutral's vote is cast in favour of The Arsenal: the discerning qualities of Arsene Wenger's teams are plain for all to see, even though they have little to do with Highbury or Islington. Like Terry Collier, I hate Chelsea and everything they stand for - though I find I hate them less in the absence of the Special One; whereas for as long as Mourinho was pratting about the touchline like some B-movie Joe Cool I found that I could tolerate Man United - yes, that erstwhile boozy cup team with a penchant for buying crap strikers, until a Glaswegian martinet straightened them out, just in term to hit Premiership paydirt.
Said tolerance has now run out again, particularly in light of yesterday's existential injustice at Old Trafford. The iniquities of how penalties get given or not given on Man U's home turf need no analysis from me. The refs just have to live with themselves. But no partial set of statistics can save the Red apologists: when push comes to shove, Man U just get away with more. The beauty of Arshavin's goal was that the strike fizzed with fury over the spot-kick he'd been denied; and yet the player himself was delightfully insouciant after bursting the net, as if sure that truth and beauty would out. Sadly, ugly reality in the shape of Wayne Roooney was lurching round the corner...

Wednesday, 26 August 2009

The Tories, The Wire, Law & Order and Chris Grayling

I'm glad I went to the Conservative Party Conference in Birmingham last September. No, really. It's the sort of thing one ought to do at least once. And I saw and heard some interesting things and some reasonable people. Chris Grayling, currently the Shadow Home Secretary, popped up at numerous meetings and talked a fair bit of sense, at least to my mind. I was particularly struck by his contributions to a panel on work and welfare, where he talked about the need to 'reinvigorate social mobility’ and spoke with what sounded like sincere feeling about the 'appalling worklessness’ of failed estates left to fester as ‘separate worlds’ in our society. Being a Tory, he advocated more back-to-work support for people wanting to get themselves sorted out, and big sticks to be wielded on non-participants. But he didn't mind when someone suggested that he and James Purnell at Work & Pensions didn't seem to have too many vital differences on policy. ‘I hope there’s not many’, Grayling offered. (He testified too to the influence of David Freud, a Blair-appointed government welfare advisor who duly jumped ship to the Tories this year.)
Where I found Grayling most human and appealing was when he argued that beggars, addicts, thieves and other individuals with form in the criminal justice system could yet be wooed back into meaningful work, albeit under a form of threat in the shape of loss of benefit entitlements. A guy from NAFCAS in the attention argued that some such people are hair-trigger types who might get pushed over the edge by such hardline strictures. But Grayling was quietly, ruefully insistent that there had to be a stick behind the carrot - there just had to be… He struck me as the most mild-mannered guy one could imagine donning the judge's black hanging cap.
But all of those good impressions seem soft and slack to me now, following Grayling's utterly foolish Silly Season argument that the American TV show The Wire functions as a portrait of contemporary inner-city Britain. I can't improve on Alastair Campbell's assault on said comments here. But I hope Grayling will think again, and put that bit of opportunistic shallowness behind him.

Wednesday, 19 August 2009

NUFC: Crisis Club turn to Fenham Eusebio...

The most cynical of Toon fans (myself most likely included, like) had taken to saying that Shola Ameobi has finally found his level in Division Two even before tonight's Shola match-winner against Sheffield Wednesday extended his hot streak from Saturday's treble versus Reading.
A sardonic edge has always attended fans' assessments of Ameobi, hence the lovely Geordie irony of the nickname 'The Fenham Eusebio', which Ameobi himself, not surprisingly, would like to see taken more seriously. Still, those such as me who were hoping to see Andy Carroll and Nile Ranger shoot the Toon to a good start in the Second Division must instead give all due thanks and praise to Foluwashola. His annoying languor and relative lack of strength (for a big lad) have surely ensured that he won't ever be an absolute top-rank striker; but if he keeps this rich form up then he could be a full-blown black-and-white legend yet.
And speaking of legends... over at Turf Moor tonight they saw the Man Utd debut of the man who was just Too Big for Newcastle United. And yet, as BBC Sport's Phil McNulty reported, "Not Michael Owen's night so far. Two presentable chances have both passed him by..."; and then, "Dimitar Berbatov is on for United, replacing Michael Owen, who had a frustrating night..." A stunning win for Burnley, and a stunning blow to Man U, duly ensued.
As Alan Shearer has often said of his mate - Michael Owen will always score goals. He will probably need to start scoring them quick, mind, if he's to satisfy all those loyal life-long Reds in Tokyo, Paris, Florida, Kabul, Hackney Wick, etc etc. Meanwhile I and umpteen other Toon fans won't be cheering England's Little Michael on.

Sunday, 16 August 2009

David Leland's The Big Man

Over the nights with a newborn spent more awake than asleep, you catch up on late telly if not on much-needed kip; and so the other evening I finally got round to seeing David Leland’s film The Big Man on BBC1, 20 years after its cinema release.
I remember it getting a rough ride at that time, yet it seemed to me like a good picture. Back then, just as now, the British cinema industry was utterly convulsed by the pressure to find a mainstream audience, both at home and overseas, and that sometimes led to quasi-commercial errors of style, packaging and casting, some of which The Big Man, too, certainly exhibits. But it also testifies to the ambitions of Steve Woolley’s and Nik Powell’s Palace Pictures, which produced the movie, and to the gifts of David Leland, one of the most formidable figures to have worked in British film and TV in the last 30 years.
The Big Man anticipates a raft of British films from the late 1990s that took the effects of the Thatcher government’s industrial policy as the starting point of the drama. Like Brassed Off and Face, this one’s heart beats on the left. Unlike Billy Elliot, it takes the 84/85 Miner’s Strike very seriously and doesn’t act as if the redemption of One could be consolation for the damnation of Many. The only thing glaringly wrong with the picture is Joanne Whalley as a doughty pit wife of middle-class provenance. (British cinema’s It Girl of the late 1980s, Whalley got a lot of parts she wasn’t right for before she moved to the US and got a lot of parts that I’m sure she hated.)
The Big Man taps into the gangster genre very directly but quite smartly: the underworld is evoked with familiar strokes but also genuine menace. Its Morricone-ish score sounds a little too familiar until you realize the score is indeed by Morricone, stealing from himself as usual. The thematic bleakness of the picture has force, in that characters one likes are made to suffer, Liam Neeson’s lead Danny Scoular above all. And there’s a useful terseness in the visual metaphor of a bag of money for the price of a man’s soul. Having tried to pull a few strokes of this sort myself in Crusaders, I thoroughly respect Leland’s efforts here.
I got to know David a little when I was compiling my book on Alan Clarke, a project to which he was immensely helpful, and I found him just as impressive in person as his body of work had suggested. He has a quiet force about him: a calmly-spoken, eloquent intelligence with a steely edge. He first met Clarke in 1973 by acting for him in a BBC taping of The Love Girl and the Innocent by Solzhenitsyn (or ‘Solly Neasden’ as Clarkey rechristened him.) Later he ran the Crucible Theatre in Sheffield, putting on tough new plays at a time when the venue was more famous for hosting world snooker tournaments. Clarke encouraged him to write: Psy-Warriors and Beloved Enemy were fascinating political dramas made at the BBC; Made in Britain, done for Central TV, is as good a film as Britain made in that decade.
Leland and Clarke were wonderfully matched in terms of their interests and uncompromising bents. As David told me, ‘In the time that I knew Alan, everything he did was coming out of current affairs… He was digging into what was happening here and now, which is always the most uncomfortable area to explore in drama. Real contemporary drama has become a thing of the past on television. First of all it’s very hard to do, it’s a fight to articulate what is out there in the present – how do you get it on paper and how do you portray it, by what means? Then it’s even harder to get the space to get it made.’
Leland duly moved into films. His script for Neil Jordan’s Mona Lisa was very interesting on class, sex and crime. He made the tone a bit lighter for his directorial debut Wish You Were Here (1987), but it was so lively and unsentimental on the subject of a girl’s sexual self-awareness that it wowed Cannes and made a star of Emily Lloyd. The Big Man didn’t perform, though. And for a few years after, I guess David had trouble getting things made. The Land Girls (1998) is an attractive period piece but it disappeared quickly.
Still, I do recall the last occasion I saw David was in 2002, across the room at Morton’s restaurant in Hollywood at a party after the Emmy Awards ceremony, where he had won a trophy for directing on Band of Brothers. Out with the Tom Hanks gang for the night, he was dapper in a black frock-coat and looked very ebullient. The best people always deserve their comebacks.

Thursday, 13 August 2009

Esquire (September 2009) on stands, and in suits

The current Esquire is devoted largely to the current state of the men's suit, and as such it reminds me fondly of why I first started reading lifestyle magazines for men back in the late 1980s, i.e. to look in wonder at fine clothes that I couldn't ever afford, draped upon men far better looking than I. As if, delusion of delusions, a suit of clothes could function as a magic mirror to another persona, another posture, another universe... For the wise word on this theme, consult The Great Gatsby, not to mention The Talented Mr Ripley.
My column is about Pedro Almodovar's Broken Embraces, wherein I make good on my pledge made in this blog to draw in the waspy wisdom of the late La Sontag:
"Almodovar’s cinema is quite often ‘camp’, in the playful, discerning, hyper-aesthetic sense that was famously hymned by Susan Sontag. And yet camp, as Sontag also showed, is quite inimical to tragedy. Where it can excel is in conveying a kind of wistful regret for the transience of sexual passion and physical beauty. Almodovar does inject some of this feeling into the latter stages of Broken Embraces..."
As it happens, I saw that Pedro Almodovar walking through Leicester Square a fortnight ago, shortly after I had left an Esquire party, speaking of devils. He didn't look too cheery, but then maybe he'd had a bad flight, or a bad meal, or was in general finding the London summer altogether less appealing than Madrid's.

Monday, 10 August 2009

"Tastes Like Ashes..."

... was, as I recall, the ruefully witty comment from master commentator Richie Benaud after sipping from a glass of champagne offered him by his BBC colleagues live on air, the occasion being the 1985 series victory sealed by David Gower's England over Allan Border's Aussies. Well, the bitter savour is all England's at present, after the stunning, incompetent failure at Headingley. All those noisy, beery oafs who reckon themselves England's most ardent and essential fans may now start to wish they had listened to Geoff Boycott's withering opinion that booing Ricky Ponting out to the crease is both unmasculine and counter-productive.
I don't always shout for England in cricket, just as I don't necessarily shout for them in any sport. It depends how I feel about the composition of the team and the individuals in it. Admittedly, this is very much an armchair fan's ethos - whereas people who carry on playing competitive sport all their lives tend in any contest to shout for The Team they're ostensibly closest to. Still, you can't make such enthusiasm up, you can only call it how you see it; and I've never seen a test cricketer I liked better than Steve Waugh, utterly consummate as batsman and captain, so I couldn't begrudge his share of the Aussie's 18-year Ashes domination following the Botham/Gower glories of the mid-1980s.
Andrew Flintoff, though, is the sort of sportsman it's very hard not to get thrilled to bits by, and so I've shouted for England as long as he's played, and got myself truly hopeful about this Ashes series after his efforts with ball and bat wrenched the initiative back England's way, despite that poor show in the first test. It's hard now to see England coming back, and I expect they'll have to try to do it without 'Fred', since he can no more take further cortisone injections in his knee than I can abide steroids in my right elbow...
Is there time for a happy end? I almost want to shout 'Yes', just because all the rest of my doomy Cassandra-like nay-saying about sport this summer has been dismally borne out. Newcastle relegated gutlessly, without a fight; Roddick left hollow-eyed by Federer's indominability at Wimbledon; Tom Watson's great failure at Turnberry (and failure, sadly, it was - a huge effort over 71 holes finally serving only to confirm that Watson will be remembered as much for the timid putting and the choking as for the eight majors won.)
I don't think the England cricket team can redeem all or any of that, Flintoff or no Flintoff, but by all means give it a go, lads. For my part I will try now to spit in the eye of the Fates and predict 2-1 to the England...

Saturday, 8 August 2009

We Are Family: Darling Daughter #2 debuts

Things have been fairly quiet on the update front in the last week largely because of the little lady to my left, and the charged run-up to her first appearance in the world on Friday. Updates are not about to get any more frequent, not for a while at least... but one's priorities have changed too, of course...